Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Comparisons


It seems men are always curious about how they measure up. This is why they are more preoccupied with size than most females. But one dark side of life and relationships that truly brings this to the forefront is when a man's lover has an affair. The pain and humiliation is sometimes accompanied by a lingering -- nagging -- thought: I bet his penis is larger than mine. Believe it or not, this sudden fear is felt by men with average to large penises. But the men who are under-endowed suffer greatly. At the core, they are most certain the lover their girlfriend or wife had taken was more endowed than they. They wonder if she initiated the affair because she needed a larger penis; they wonder if she enjoyed it much more; and if she would ever be able to come back.

Men who suffer through this often suffer physiologically. Many are unable to achieve an erection -- not only with their unfaithful lover, but even new lovers. Only in private masturbation can their penis become erect. Another manifestation is severe premature ejaculation -- lasting only one or two thrusts and sometimes ejaculating before penetration. Sometimes this is combined. I had one client whose wife had an affair with a man whose penis was twice the size of his. They reconciled their relationship, but sex was non existent. He was unable to muster more than 1/2 an erection (about 2.5 inches and less than 3 inches in circumference -- his full status was 4 inches by 3.5 inches). Even with this, his wife still pursued intercourse, but he either ejaculated in her hand as she guided him in, or once he penetrated -- before even thrusting.

He was one who never accepted his penis was small -- never wanted to think about it or confront his insecurity. It wasn't until his wife had the affair that he had to face this powerful internal fear. Part of their therapy was to accept his small penis, and to realize this was only one part of who he is as a man and lover. His wife opened up about her feelings towards him as a husband and as a lover. She also discussed in detail lovers she had previous to their relationship and did the same with her three encounters with her latest lover. While she divulged her sexual history, I had her gently caress his penis. Within thirty minutes, he was completely erect, but ejaculated almost at once. I had her continue caressing and discussing in detail her sexual history. When she was done, he was fully erect again. I told her to mount him and to move very slowly. He was able to last about five minutes.

This, of course, did not take place on their first session, but on their 9th. It took quite a while for them both to open up. But theirs is a story of comparisons -- ones many make each day. How often do you hear about a woman cheating on her husband and wonder, I bet her lover has a bigger penis than her husband!
It's a thought mostly shared by men, but a popular one nonetheless.

12 comments:

  1. I think the question that begs to be answered is how many women have affairs because they want a cock bigger than the one their husband has?

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  2. kathy
    my penis is 145mm long and 115mm around the shaft (about 125mm around the head). Can you advise best condom size (eg 49 or 54mm nominal width). There does,t seem to be any clear guidance on this anywhere.

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  3. for me the only question would be if she is ok with my cock. if she's ok with it, than no problem, I'll try my best to satisfy her.
    kathy, can you please post something for virgins with small equipment? i am in this situation...
    and more pics with this hot blonde? I really like her

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  4. I hope you decide to start posting again soon. This is a terrific blog and you have a fresh perspective on something that has bothered me for quite some time.

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  5. aww, where'd you go? i just found this blog and your style of therapy is as fascinating as the questions you pose and the situations you probe. :)

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  6. I'm curious if anyone watched the new HBO series Hung on Sunday. I saw it and liked it and thought the subject was appropriate for discussion here. In the 1st episode he has sex twice with the same woman and both times she has multiple orgasms and can't stop telling that he is, "so big."

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  7. I think it is normal for a woman to prefer a well hung guy for status and pleasure reasons.

    Most guys aren't shy about wanting the prettier, bigger titted, better figured girl.

    What girl would want her son to inherit a under-sized cock?

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  8. Wow two person taking of single girl.

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  9. yes i do compare myself i always check all the other men out at the mens room urinal trough and at work shower room and the gym shower room i am usually the smallest cocked uncircumcised cock in the shower it does give me a infiriority complex and i have total cock size envy when ever i see a hung stud swingging his manhood!

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  10. My g/f would openly tell me how facinated she was with cocks, especially big thick ones.

    I get really anxious and really do feel very inferior.

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